Child Development 101:
The Middle School Years
Presented by: Dr. Dawn-Elise Snipes
Executive Director, AllCEUs
Continuing Education (CE) credits can be earned for this presentation at https://allceus.com/member/cart/index/product/id/613/c/
Objectives
~ Review developmental tasks children accomplish at this stage
~ Examine how children’s thinking patterns are different than that of both toddlers and adolescents
~ Explore ways to assist children in enhancing their self esteem
~ Introduce Kholberg’s theory of moral development
Kholberg’s Theory of Moral Development
~ Level 1 – Pre-conventional morality 0-9 years
~ No personal code of morality.
~ Moral code is shaped by the standards of adults and the benefits and consequences of compliance
~ Stage 1. Obedience and Punishment Avoidance
~ If a person is punished, they must have done wrong.
~ Centrated, egocentric, dichotomous thinking (Preoperational thought)
~ Stage 2. Individualism and Exchange.
~ Recognize that there can be multiple “right” views.
~ Different individuals have different viewpoints. (Concrete operational thought)
Kholberg’s Theory of Moral Development
~ Level 2 – Conventional morality (9+ years)
~ Internalized moral standards of valued adult role models.
~ Authority is internalized but not questioned
~ Reasoning is based on the norms of the peer group
~ Stage 3. Good Interpersonal Relationships.
~ Desire to be seen as being a good person by others.
~ Stage 4. Maintaining the Social Order.
~ Awareness of the wider rules of society
~ Judgments concern upholding the law and to avoiding guilt.
Piaget’s Theory of Cognitive Development
~ Ages 7-11 Concrete Operational
~ Children are beginning to be able to evaluate things on more than one characteristic
~ Able to use inductive reasoning, drawing general conclusions from personal experiences and specific facts
~ Struggle with DEductive reasoning, or using a general principle to predict an event
~ Abstract and hypothetical thinking is not yet developed
~ Starting to be able to see (albeit not necessarily agree with) other people’s perspectives
Piaget
~ Formal Operational
~ Abstract thinking and hypothesizing begin
~ Inductive reasoning: My experiences lead me to predict….
~ Deductive reasoning: Based on a general principle, I can expect/predict
~ The data against which hypotheses are based for 11-14 year olds is quite limited
~ School:
~ Algebra
~ Science labs
Piaget
~ Formal Operational
~ The data against which hypotheses are based for 11-14 year olds is quite limited
~ Social
~ My experiences with this group lead me to expect ___ from anyone like them (Stereotyping activity)
~ General rules (Rules list activity)
~ No good deed goes unpunished
~ Karma
~ Emotional reasoning and blaming
Maslow
~ Biological Needs –Preventing Vulnerabilities/Emotional Regulation
~ Sleep
~ Developing an effective, independent sleep routine
~ Nutrition
~ Building blocks for healthy body and brain
~ Mindfulness of eating for hunger and attending to nutritional cravings (dehydration, iron, calcium etc…)
~ Awareness of the impact of stimulants and sugar
~ Sunlight
~ Sets circadian rhythms
~ Vitamin D
Maslow
~ Biological Needs
~ Medical care
~ Exercise
~ Stress relief
~ Self-esteem “I did that”
~ Raise serotonin levels
~ Develop healthy movement habits
Maslow
~ Safety (External and Internal)
~ From physical harm
~ Reduce trauma from low grade-chronic stress
~ Re-parenting: Address brain changes caused by chronic stress or trauma (HPA-Axis / Adrenal Fatigue)
~ From emotional harm
~ Mindfulness
~ Distress tolerance
~ Interpersonal Effectiveness/Communication skills
http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/html/dbt_skills_list.html
Maslow
~ Safety (External and Internal)
~ Explore attributions
~ Global vs. Specific
~ Internal vs. External
~ Stable vs. Changeable
~ Introduce and explore the concept of locus of control (Scenario Activity—What can you control/change?)
~ Do self-esteem exercises
~ Continue the concept of Acceptance and Commitment
~ Accept what is and who you are
~ Commit your energies to becoming the best you that you can be (Group values activity)
Maslow
~ Love, Belonging and Self-Esteem
~ Identity vs. Role Confusion (12-18 Years)
~ Search for a sense of self and personal identity, through exploration of personal values, beliefs and goals relating to many roles:
~ (Middle School) Interpersonal
~ Fidelity involves being able to accept others, even when there may be ideological differences.
~ Social Influences
~ Pubertal self-help – re. physical changes
~ Social support – protection against turmoil
~ Identity formation – mirror
~ Values clarification – sounding board
Maslow
~ Love, Belonging and Self-Esteem
~ Identity vs. Role Confusion (12-18 Years)
~ Failure to establish a sense of identity may cause the individual to be unsure about themselves or their place in society.
~ External validation
~ Fears of isolation, rejection, failure
~ Pressuring someone into an identity can result in
~ Rebellion in the form of establishing a negative identity—or the opposite of what is expected.
~ Expected that he/she will follow in parental footsteps
~ Attempts to merge the expected identity with the preferred identity
~ “Superwoman”
TIPS—Parenting and Reparenting
~ Become a student of your child (or your inner child)
~ Insist on respect and show respect (to yourself)
~ Be direct, but not too direct
~ Be available when he or she is ready
~ Schedule (uggh—eye roll) bonding time
~ Ask why. Engage in role/value related discussions to model perspective taking, encourage openness (with yourself)
~ Pay attention to what your child (you) loves to do.
~ Identify what your child is (you are) good at, and create many chances to hone skills in this area.
TIPS
~ Keep computers, laptops, televisions in common areas.
~ Model and engage children in DBT skills.
~ Mealtime mindfulness
~ Guide children through distress tolerance skills (ACCEPTS/Improve on the wall)
~ Discuss the concept of Radical Acceptance
~ Accepting that reality is what it is.
~ Accepting that the event or situation causing you pain has a cause.
~ Accepting life can be worth living even with painful events in it.
~ Schedule time for nondigital fun.
TIPS
~ Talk about sexting. Explain the legal and emotional fallout from sexting to your kids.
~ Let them experience (accept responsibility for) real-life consequences.
~ Teach kids to make it right with others when they make mistakes.
~ Discipline BEHAVIORS, explore the rationale, forgive quickly. (including yourself)
~ Be careful when kids confess. Watch your reactions (pay attention to your internal critic) closely.
Summary
~ Middle school children are starting to explore identity
~ They are becoming more able to take other’s perspectives
~ They desire to be a good person in other’s eyes
~ Fears of isolation, rejection and failure are paramount.
~ The world/people are still relatively unpredictable
~ Their reasoning is still often faulty due to inexperience and lack of data
~ They often still fall into traps of overgeneralization/stereotyping and all-or-nothing thinking
Summary cont
~ Middle schoolers are better able to understand the concept or radical acceptance
~ Middle schoolers are growing as fast as toddlers. Increased vulnerabilities include
~ Awkwardness/physical changes
~ Hormone fluctuations
~ Needing more sleep
~ Weight changes/insatiable hunger
Summary cont
~ Much of their reasoning is still often emotion focused. Help them become more fact focused
~ Distress tolerance skills are also of paramount importance at this stage because middle school through high school is often characterized by high emotionality.
~ Adults who experienced setbacks during middle school years
~ May need to grieve a lost childhood
~ Can more easily develop the emotional and self-esteem skills they missed